- Tupac Shakur
So since i have nowhere else to be able to talk, i guess ill be doing it here.
Lately it seems like everyone is to busy for me.. maybe its just me, but when i need someone to talk to nobody is ever really there for me. Of course they all say they are, but whats the point if nobody can help whats going on. I always seem to pick all the bad choices for myself, thinking that i would be okay, but im not. im really not, and i dont know what to do. When you have no job, nothing to do, mostly because of basically no income, and not really having friends, a person can get into a really bad slump like i am. I know there is people on here, that i know in real life, but you guys cant do anything to help me, i can only really help myself by trying to make better choices. Id really do anything at this point to help out my parents getting farther in the new world that they are in. Ive been considering moving to a new place in the same province that i am in, but yet again i dont know if thats the best choice for me.. I dont know if i should go, if it even works out ( cause i have alot of doubt in it). Id be able to have a job, and id be with someone who loves me, and has been with me for over a year now throughout alot of difficult shit. But on the other hand, i dont know if i should wait to go up with my parents, its the same thing really. A job, and id be able to go back to school and get my education that i failed to get due to depression. All that i do know is, that i need a new start. This town is draining me, and make the best of it, im basically a gypsi now.. My dog and I, just jumping from place to place, and its not good. Currently im at my grandparents place, and i have that wonderful sense of home. Just to fill you in, on whom ever is reading this. I havent had a ‘home’ in a very long time. Something came up, and i had to leave the home that i was in, for 14 years to end up being where i am today.. i have moved so much in the last 6 years, back and forth from different places, and not really having anywhere to call home. Just having a place to lay your head is not a place to call home. I miss my parents, and i havent had it better then i did, when i was with them. Momma always told me that i could always have it worse then what i do, and she was right. Im in a bad place, and i dont know how to get out. I just really need someone to talk to, to be able to give every detail of everything thats going on, and what has been going on, cause frankly if i dont get some help, or a change happen soon, i dont know what im gunna do with myself, and thats what scares me the most. I already put on a fake smile every day, so nobody gets too worried about me. And not one person knows everything about me. My friends only know what i want to tell them, what i feel they can be trusted with, and its pretty bad that i dont have a friend that i can fully trust anymore.. it actually hurts me so bad. and not to mention, i fell like a horrible person. Fucking Terrible. Im in a slump and i only ever make it worse for myself. It seems that lately, the only living being that cheers me up, and that will always be by my side, is my dog. I love him more then anything. And thats also the only reason im debating on moving else where in the province, so im able to take my dog with me. I dont wanna have to put him down if i leave the province, hes a big part of my family, hes a big part of me, and as long as hes still kicking, i know that i will be too, cause i would never leave him alone in this world.
But i guess for now, im going to go. Watch some tv, or something. Hopefully get to smoke a draw soon. ( seems to be the only way to keep me calm nowadays). So, i bid you adu. and i thank you for listening to me. Ill be back. where else am i gunna go? hahaha.
I wish I had someone to constantly talk to. I only really have a select few I talk to, and they always seem to busy for me. So I try not to bother, But id like to have a friend again that would talk to me from the time he/she woke up to the time we fall asleep. I miss thoes days.. no wonder im going mental.
Oh my oh my, where do I start..
Im completely going to snap and I dont know what to do, ive never been so confused and upset in my life, im honestly so fucked up at this point.
Everything is just going downhill and I don’t know how to get back up. I dont know how much more I can fuck things up and out myself in a worse position.. but guaranteed im gunna do it. Fuck me. I need help.
The idea to display the pets inside the store started in Singapore as a collaboration between Ikea and two animal shelters, according to Business Insider. Together they formed the project Home for Hope.
this actually broke my heart a little bit and i cried what has the internet done to me wait no i just FUCKING LOVE DOGS SO MUCH